imagine a horror movie where you’re trapped in your house with a serial killer but all your lights are clappers
so you’re running for your life from this psychopath while both of you are just aggressively clapping the lights on and off
But you know your house better than they do. You probably can find your way around almost completely in the dark, including avoiding all the counters and doors. Imagine a stranger trying to navigate YOUR home in the dark.
imagine being stuck in a room surrounded by everyone you’ve ever had sex with
imagine being stuck in a room surrounded by everyone you’ve ever thought about having sex with
oh god NO
oh god YES
Imagine your cousin sitting there wondering what he has in common with these people
knowledge is knowing that a tomato is a fruit
wisdom is not putting it in a fruit salad
That was deep
philosophy is wondering if that means ketchup is a smoothie
That was deeper.
common sense is knowing that ketchup isn’t a damn smoothie you nasty
If you think about it, the process of singing the birthday song and cutting the cake is extremely satanic
no but seriously imagine it this way
a small gathering of people huddle around a object on fire, chanting ritualistically a repetitive song in unison until the fire is blown out and a knife is stabbed into the object
you must be fun at parties
my parents are lucky i was too lazy to go through a rebellious phase
if someone calls you a slut, break their fucking neck without even hesitating or saying a single word and as they lay there on the ground dead, lean down close to their corpse and whisper
“slut means the end in swedish”
this is the most popular post i’ve ever made and its still fuckin going and i am GLAD
if lucifer needs someones consent to enter their body then so do you
You know whats annoying? That it’s normal to know everything there is to know about football and know every players name and know the scores and dress up for games etc but god forbid someone knows all the actors of lord of the rings names and dresses up as a character for comic con, thats just SAD.
SOMEONE FINALLY SAID IT
can a ghost and a zombie come from the same person
Is this a comic? This should be a comic.
"no stupid, oh my god. no just… just turn… fuck. don’t wander over there, you’re gonna fall down the… aaand there he goes………….. moron.”